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Saturday, April 20, 2019
Hers not a passing brought up as an afterthought,
a mention in a conversational ‘by-the-way;’ or ‘oh, it happened,’
or confined to an obituary.
Grandma Cerulli’s passing is momentous.

Proud, competent, responsible, full of love,
a moral compass, supportive, leader by example.
The ultimate woman, she, my sons’ remaining grandmother.

So much like her eldest daughter, who, without asking,
imbued those close to her with a desire to please her,
or make her proud.

Perpetualizing herself in progeny cut from the same jib.

I met and wooed that eldest daughter,
and for some months thought she so stunningly wonderful,
she must be unique.

Until, as a couple, we visited her parents’ home to make introductions.
So clearly remember that mid-afternoon meeting,
as clearly as yesterday,
arriving at Toni-Lee’s childhood home,
getting out of the car,
the front door swinging open,
Grandma Cerulli emerging with a huge smile,
matched by her daughter’s,
the two so obviously in love,
exchanging kisses and hugs and then the introduction.

And the realization gleaned from her bearing,
that the hitherto unique Toni-Lee no more, no less than her mother’s daughter.

What a moment in the presence of these two extraordinary people,
witnessing a display of affection alien to my own experience.

With no reason to, except her unshakable confidence in her daughter’s decisions,
Grandma Cerulli immediately accepted and supported me as a choice,
and us as a couple.

For decades afterwards she positively impacted
our lives and those of her grandchildren, for a long time confined to our three fresh little boys whom she adored.

Later, they would repay her love
with some of the love they had stored
from their first memories of her.

Every holiday, Grandma Cerulli and Grandpa, and their younger, unmarried children,
car laden with suitcases and holiday pies and casseroles,
made the trip from New Jersey to Boston or Cape Cod
to celebrate with us.

Decades later, now in her nineties,
broken-hearted but stoic,
after an endless period of watching Toni-Lee fade,
Grandma Cerulli attended her eldest child’s memorial,
less than two years ago.

Afterwards, continuing to relate to her large family.
Until this week.

Hers not a passing brought up as an afterthought,
a mention in a conversational ‘by-the-way;’ or ‘oh, it happened,’
or confined to an obituary.
Grandma Cerulli’s passing is momentous.

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Question of the Day:
What is a grandparent?

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Postings Count, Weather Brief, and Dinner
Saturday, April 20, 2019

My 379th consecutive posting, committed to 5,000.
After 379 posts we’re at the 7.58% mark of my commitment, the commitment a different way of marking the passage of time.

Time is 12.01am.

On Saturday, Boston’s temperature will reach a high of 66* with a feels-like temperature of 75* with rain and thundershowers.

Dinner for tonight will be Roast Goose with company. 

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Saturday, April 20, 2019

Love your notes.
Contact me at domcapossela@hotmail.com

This from Gary K trying out the slow-roast recipe with accompanying photo.

Getting the hang of your roast  🐔

G

Web Meister Responds: What is the cup doing there? And why has so much juice collected in the roasting pan?

And Gary sends this:

Well first things first it was delicious. 

We followed your recipe for preparing the bird and browning the sides. That is where the cup comes in to prop up the bird to roast the sides. So all goes according to plan until the last step where the recipe calls for brushing the spice/herb mixture on dry and then brushing the oil on. I must admit I wasn’t paying close attention and so I mixed the oil with the spices and made a slurry and then brushed this mixture on the bird for the last step in the oven.

I have made this recipe maybe 10-12 times and I have to say this was the best ever. As to where the juices came from I must say the bird and must say that the skin dipped in the juices was heavenly:) I am not really motivated to look into this question of why so many juices rather I am just happy they are there.

Neuroscience research stays that these days people are motivated by purpose, autonomy and mastery. So in that regard my purpose was clear, I had some autonomy in deviating from the recipe and although I haven’t achieved mastery I made some progress along the path. So it seems I am motivated to make the recipe again with a consistent purpose, perhaps more autonomy (who can say how or where) and hopefully achieve more mastery in the process.

Cheers,

Gary

Web Meister Responds: So we have uncovered a true cook, one for whom each making is an adventure.
That is exactly how I feel.
And the brilliance of this is that two cooks, with the same thoughts, can produce two different results, each delicious.
Hey, my friend, well done. Congratulations.

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And Victor P sends this:

Dom,

Enjoying the daily blog.  I thought you would like to see today's dictionary. com's word of the day.

Sta bene,

Victor

umami [oo-mah-mee]

a strong meaty taste, often considered to be one of the basic taste sensations along with sweet, sour, bitter, and salty, imparted by glutamate and certain other amino acids.

Web Meister Responds: I’ve been trying to commit this definition to memory but so far have failed.
This might do it for me. Thanks, Victor.

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Chuckle of the Day:
At a weekly husband's marriage seminars, the guidance counselor asked Michael, whose 25th wedding anniversary was fast approaching, to share his insight on long relationships.

Michael said this: “Whenever we’re together I treat her very well. She especially likes to go out and eat without the kids. So we do.
But I think that the best idea I ever had was on our 5th anniversary, to take her and the kids to my parents’ home town in Maida, Sicily.”

“Wonderful,” said the counselor. “And what are you planning for your 25th?”

“I’m going back to Maida to pick them up.”

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Answer to the Question of the Day:
Grandparents are the parents of a person's father or mother – paternal or maternal.

In cases where parents are unwilling or unable to provide adequate care for their children (e.g., death of the parents, financial obstacles, marriage problems, grandparents often take on the role of primary caregivers.
Even when this is not the case, and particularly in traditional cultures, grandparents often have a direct and clear role in relation to the raising, care and nurture of children.
Grandparents are second-degree relatives and share 25% genetic overlap.

A step-grandparent can be the step-parent of the parent or the step-parent's parent or the step-parent's step-parent (though technically this might be called a step-step-grandparent).

The various words for grandparents at times may also be used to refer to any elderly person, especially the terms gramps, granny, grandfather, grandmother, nan, maw-maw, paw-paw and others which families make up themselves.

The parents of a grandparent, or the grandparents of a parent, are called the same names as grandparents (grandfather/-mother, grandpa/-ma, granddad/-ma, etc.) with the prefix great- added, with an additional great- added for each additional generation.
One's great-grandparent's parents would be "great-great-grandparents".

To avoid a proliferation of "greats" when discussing genealogical trees, one may also use ordinals instead of multiple "greats"; thus a "great-great-grandfather" would be the "second great-grandfather", and a "great-great-great-grandfather" would be a third great-grandfather, and so on.

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Since taking care of grandchildren could be a highly demanding job that requires constant energy and time devotion, grandparental involvement in child raising could have a negative impact on grandparents’ physical and emotional health.
For example, taking care of grandchildren can reduce grandparents’ own time for self-care such as missing their medical appointments. Therefore, they are likely to have a higher chance to suffer from physical health issues.

Besides physical health issues, grandparents are also likely to have emotional issues.
To be more specific, raising young children again could be a stressful and overwhelming experience and thus results in different kinds of negative emotions such as anxiety or depression. In addition to physical and emotional issues, grandparents who are involved in caring for their grandchildren can also suffer socially.

For instance, grandparents will be forced to limit their social activities so as to care for their grandchildren.
By doing so, grandparents become more isolated from their social relations.
Taking care of grandchildren also means more responsibilities, grandparents would fear for their grandchildren’s future well-being because of their disability and death in the future.
If grandparents cannot handle the caregiver role of their grandchildren well, this job can eventually become a burden or stressor and bring more severe physical health and emotional issues to grandparents.

However, there are also positive effects of being involved in grandchildren raising.
Compared with grandparents who do not provide caregiving to their grandchildren, those who take care of their grandchildren with long hours are more likely to have better cognitive functions.
To be more specific, taking care of grandchildren helps elder grandparents maintain their mental capacities in later life, they are also less likely to develop diseases such as dementia.
Moreover, frequent interactions with their grandchildren could reduce the cognitive aging process, allowing grandparents a chance to live a more vibrant and active life.

Grandparents also get benefits of physically exercising more during this process.

Taking care of grandchildren can also have benefits on grandparents’ emotional health.
As an example, many grandparents start to feel a sense of purpose and meaning in life again after their retirement; as another example, their ties with their adult children and grandchildren are also strengthened.

Many grandparents also think of the caregiving experience as positive because it provides another chance for them to make up mistakes they made with their own children and give them more opportunities to educate their grandchildren and improve their parenting styles.

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Good Morning on this Saturday, the Twentieth Day of April.

We posted a remembrance of Grandma.
And in short order counted our postings, talked about the weather, and ordered Seared/Broiled Fish for dinner.
Gary gave us a nice take on his fun in cooking chicken, and Victor P shared a great word, umami.
We gave us the chuckle for the day and discussed grandparents.

And now? Gotta go.

Che vuoi? Le pocketbook?

See you soon.

Your love.